Stoneys

I went to Stoneys, a country bar in Las Vegas, last night with my brother, his girlfriend, and his girlfriend's friends. At first it was a little boring, they didn't really want to dance and I've become the type that will try at least once to learn the dances. After a while, and a few drinks down, it become more fun. I was asked to dance three times, one by a super skinny cowboy, one by a kind of cute but smoking guy, and one by a hottie, who was the only one I said yes to. The hottie quickly handed me off though cause I had no rhythm and wasn't yet intoxicated enough to let loose and get down =).The only reason why I turned down the cowboy was cause it was the two step and I am horrible at it on a regular basis, last night I was wearing stiletto boots so I definitely would have broken some of his feet bones. So note to self, learn how to dance so next time a hot guy asks you to dance you won't embarrass yourself.

My Week in Summary

Since I haven't been blogging too much lately I'll do a recap of the week. Sunday, the "big" holiday was spent out at Six Tunnels near Hoover Dam with my co-workers running about 6 miles of the trail. It was so beautiful. I haven't been out there since I was little, and its definitely going on the favorite places around here to run list. I worked the remainder of the day and then spent the evening at home with my brother watching movies and eating some of the candy that our mom sent us for V day. It went against my diet, but I figured after that day I would get back on it. Monday I worked yet again all day long. I came home to find my brother "making" dinner, he got Chinese food. So I pigged out on that and had some more cookies and told myself that would be the last night of breaking the diet. Tuesday I woke up at my now usual time 5:30 am to head to the gym for an hour run before I went to work for the day. Wednesday morning was spent at the gym again for a 33 minute speed workout that Brent designed for Leslie, one of our co-workers, but I copied and slowed down a little. I worked until 3. At work me and Kayla each had our one year reviews and got a raise (Yea for more money). I hate thinking about how long its been and how I'm still stuck in a retail job. But it does have its good days. I did the group run at work getting in another 4 miles at a bit faster than normal, for me at least, speed and it felt good. I ended the day with yoga at the gym, which always is a good way to end the day, very peaceful. Today I slept in a little since I didn't want to run until after work. I ran 6 miles, a bit slow cause my legs felt a bit sore and stiff but my body will eventually get used to it. On my way to the grocery store I got a text message from my ex: "Hey how are you it's mike remember!" Umm... yeah I remember you. I've been attempting to get you out of my life. You basically disappeared while we were dating and then proceeded to blame it on me. And then you got creepy after a month of no communication, attempting to start where we left off, asking me to send you picture. And then you texted me yet again last month, that time I ignored it but it seems you didn't get the message. But this time I will be nice, like an old friend and respond with the casual "I'm good. How are you?" and "Mainly just working and running. U?" And see where the conversation leads, cause I'm not the one whose going to be taking it anywhere.

The Biggest Loser

So I've been neglecting my blog lately, just haven't been in the mood to write, plus nothing really excited has happened lately....Anyway this past week I've been sticking to my training and diet and am luckily seeing the effects of it all. I'm finding that with healthy diet and exercise, my mood tends to be on the happier side. And now at work we have extended the goal to everyone, me and Kayla are working out together in hopes that we'll both be able to motivate each other in weight loss. Starting Saturday we're going to have weekly weight ins to see who can drop the most poundage in the next six weeks. Its basically between me, Kayla, and Brent; Jessica wants to do it but she's got no fat on her to lose and has a different image in her head that we don't want to condone any eating disorder effects for her to be able to beat all of us, so we are trying not to include her. Anyway I think for me it will be easy to lose five pounds, but not sure if I'll be able to beat Brent since this past week I've already dropped four pounds just from kicking out carbohydrates in my diet. I'm thinking before Saturday's weigh in I'll eat a big meal so it will add a little and I'll be able to show weight loss next week. My goal was to get down to between 120 and 125 but now I'm thinking I might want the same goal as Kayla, to get down into the 'teens. I haven't been that light in a long time so I'm not sure now easy or realistic it will be but we shall see in the next six weeks what happens.

Whipped

On my way home from work today I saw this white Toyota Corolla that reminded me of my Dad's. On the back was a bumper sticker that stated, "I Love my Wife." I thought it seemed a little excessive and needy, because I'm sure it was the Wife that purchased the sticker for her husband, or even went to the extreme of sticking it on the car herself. Is their relationship in that much trouble that she has to remind everyone that yes he is claimed? Or am I just so anti-public affection that it just makes me gag? Either way I will never make my husband go through embarrassing measures to show that he really loves me. I would rather the words be coming from his mouth that a sticker on the butt of his car.

Sleep Talkin' Man

So this blog, Sleep Talkin' Man is written by this English mans wife and is basically all the things that he says at night in his sleep. She tape records him and then types them up in a blog. On of my favorites, which is my new philosophy in life is:

"Life is precious. I'm not going to just sit here

listening to your pathetic fucking dribble."

...So true and hilarious!

Working

I switched days with Brent at work so now I'm working today and have friday off. It may be a permanent thing because it seems like he needs the day off. It just means I have to switch up my training/exercise schedule, so no big deal.

I'm starting up the Saturday group runs at work again and am supposed to come up with a catchy name. Too bad I have no creativity right now. Any suggests would be greatly appreciated?

Today

Went to the Bodies Exhibit in the Luxor today. I've been planning on going, wanting to go since my bff Gina told me about it a few years ago when her family went. Then it came to SD but

I never went. And then when I heard it was in LV, it went on the list of things to do to get out of the house. When I saw an ad at the gym for 50% off with my gym membership I knew my plan was going to finally be put into action. So after a few weeks of postponing it yet again, I finally went there today. It was very interesting. Most of the information I knew already from my anatomy classes, but to be able to see real human specimens and diseased organs and developing stages of fetuses put some perspective into the information that I've had stored for the past few years. The only thing that got to me were the immature little teenagers that were giggling at the naked, skinned bodies. Their parents should have left them at home, knowing what the exhibit would have to show and that it wasn't for immature audiences. After the exhibit I played some more guitar hero. If we owned that game, I would be even a bigger slacker. I finished the night with a Chi Tea Latter at Starbucks while I worked on my resume and my new training schedule. Starting Monday I'm getting back on a schedule and diet. So much funnnnn =) Tomorrow I'm getting my car looked at to see if there is any real damage from the accident. Hopefully its nothing big, cause my wallet can't afford it.

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/bmcla001

Guitar Hero

A perfect way to relax after an annoying long day at work: playing guitar hero. Now off to bed, no work tomorrow!

Close Call to Death

Monday after work I drove straight to my parents house in Oceanside. After arriving, and filling up on coffee, we left for our 8 hour drive to Sacramento to see my brother. We didn't stay long in Sacramento, just the day, but it was worth the drive and exhaustion to get to visit with him and see the city for a little while. Walking around town and going to one of the Sacramento Starbucks made me add the city to a possible future living location. I loved the business like atmosphere and the possibility of meeting new and exciting people. We left heading for Oceanside that night, after a few little naps. Arriving back on Wednesday morning, I was ready to sleep all day, but I figured I would make the most of the day and take my car in to get the 30,000 mile service, which I had been neglecting to do. The mechanic in town, TNT auto, is trustworthy and my dad has been a loyal customer for the past 6 or so years, so I wanted the best to check up on my car, and knew they wouldn't charge me outrageous prices. I spent the rest of the day napping, went to dinner with my parents, and then we went and watched Extraordinary Measures, which was rather good. I want to read the book now.

I left for Vegas around 7:30 pm. I had considered sleeping for a while and then heading out early in the morning so I could get back in time for bed, but I figured that I would rather be able to laze around in the morning instead of stress to get to work on time. With a thermos full of coffee and a few snacks to help keep me awake I headed home. About two miles south of Baker, about an hour away from Vegas, I ran my car off the side of the road. I don't remember what exactly I was doing, but I had taken my eyes off the road for only a second and suddenly hit the grid on the center divider that's supposed to help keep drivers from falling asleep. When I hit the grid, it seemed to pull my car more towards the center which freaked me out so I pulled the wheel to the right, but too much. I started swerving, hit the brakes which did nothing but make me swerve even more. My car spun around, I remember a second when it was facing toward the on coming traffic, and then kept spinning. The next thing I knew, my car drove off the right side of the freeway and landed in a ditch. It was my first accident, and one of the scariest things in my life. It felt like a roller coaster, whipping my body around like it was a lifeless rag doll with no control of what was happening. Fortunately I sustained no injuries. Two good Samaritans stopped to help and make sure I was alright, a couple from Santa Barbara and an older gentleman from Alaska. The couple had called the police to report the accident right after it happened. I called AAA, my dependable heroes, who have always been there to assist me with the smaller car issues, like dead batteries and a blown out tire. The CHP arrived and waited with me for AAA. The two officers and the tow truck driver hauled my poor car out of the ditch. The front right side bumper was terribly scratched and had snapped off the hook, one of the officers was able to put it back on, not sure if its in the correct place though. the back left side bumper was also snapped out, the light cover broken. The front left tire seemed to be the most damaged out of everything. There were rocks and sticks stuck in between the tire and the wheel well and the hub cap was trashed. The tow truck driver took me to a shop in Baker, fixed my tire and checked to make sure everything was good.

Though my car is kind of banged up, everything turned out okay. I'm so thankful to all those who lent a helping hand last night and I hope good things will return their way. The accident has gotten me thinking a lot about life and death. I had always thought that in my last moments I would be praying for forgiveness for all the wrong that I've done in the past, as cliche and selfish as that sounds. But I had no thoughts of prayer at all. I had one moment where I thought that it was the end for me. It terrifies me to think what if I did die, what happens next. I've always considered the religious beliefs that there is an afterlife, but I ponder now what if there is none. I do know for certain that I'm going to take this second chances at life and live to fulfill as much as I can of my dreams and wishes for life.

One weird thing that did happen last night, about 30 minutes or so before the accident, my emergency lights went on. I figure that I accidentally hit then when turning the fan vent, but considering I've never done it before it makes me think that it was some sort of sign. I believe some what in karma and that if you do good things for others, the favor will return back to you. Now I'm starting to think that my semi-premonitions about dying in a car accident and the sign of the emergency lights have some relevance.

Going to California

Tomorrow after work I'm leaving for CA. I'm meeting up with my parents and then we are going to Sacramento to visit my brother. I'll probably be out of touch for a few days but will report all the fun excitement that happens on a ten hour road trip stuck in a small car with your parents. Can't wait.

Life Lesson #1

I attempted to give certain people second chances; tried to extend the hand of friendship once again and see if the person would want to reciprocate. But once again I learned that I should trust my instincts from now on and stop wasting my time trying to be their friend. Its funny because this particular individual had a fight with their best friend about how she was flaking and not responding to the friends text messages. But this certain person said that it was the friends fault. When I heard the story I had to agree with the friend, cause the person did the same thing to me. No more. I have real friends that don't treat me like shit and use me only when they want something. I'm finding that the stereotype about California girls being the most self-centered and non-welcoming to new friends is a lie, cause I've meet more girls like that in Vegas than any city in California.

Day Off

So I worked all day yesterday, then passed out cause I was exhausted. The past few I've been getting up at 5:30am so I can get to the gym before work and stick to a workout schedule. This morning wasn't so good. When my alarm went off at 6 I was too tired to get up so I decided to skip the gym and sleep in. I kind of overslept, which feels as bad as not getting enough sleep. Anyway, no more sleeping in for me after today.

I finish A Million Little Pieces yesterday at work. Even with all the controversy about whether everything is factual in it, I still loved it. I read it more as a fiction novel anyway. I would give it a 5 out of 5. The writing style, the figurative and descriptive writing, and the way he choose where to put flashbacks into the story kept me intrigued.

Now I'm reading Nicholas Sparks' Dear John. This book shouldn't take me as long as the other book, mainly cause its a romance and those I can't put down, and its half the size. I cannot wait

until the movie comes out. Channing Tatum is so hot, even though I don't find him to be that god of an actor, I think he has gotten better at acting since his first films. But you knows he's just there to look at anyway =) Who wouldn't want to stare at him for two hours?!?

After Dear John, I'm going to borrow Nineteen Minutes from my friend Kayla. Any suggests what I should read after that???

Angel Taylor. My New Favorite Artist

So when I was at the gym today, watching music videos while running on the treadmill, I discovered a new artist that I really love. Her name is Angel Taylor. She sounds like Colbie Calliat, which is the type of music I love. Its soulful and relaxing. Anyway not only did I love this song, I love the video. Mainly because it gives me hope that my plan to meet the man of my dream at a coffee shop is possible =) Anyway enjoy...

Fifteen Minutes of Fame

So today when I was leaving the gym, the local Fox News guy was outside and stopped me to ask if I wanted to voice my opinion about the way people drive in the rain around here. Well I declined. I mean come on, I just got done working out and it was raining outside. If I'm going to be on TV I want it to be when my makeup and hair are done and when I actually have cable so I can watch myself on TV =)

At the same time though, when I got in my car I kind of kicked myself for not being a "Yes, man;" I mean thats my New Years resolution. Knowing me though I would have got nervous and freaked out and looked like an idiot so its better to save myself from humiliation and decline an opportunity to be famous for a second. Oh well next time I'll be ready...

Sleepy

Feeling a bit tired to really write a blog right now. Basically slept in and worked all day. Nothing exciting. It continued to rain, and is supposed to rain for the rest of the week.

Three Reasons Why I Hate When it Rains in Las Vegas:

1) People don't know how to drive in the rain here.

2) Who ever constructed the streets was an idiot because at nig

ht when the streets are wet you cannot see the lane lines. Therefore, I was potentially hit twice tonight driving home.

3) When it rains, it tends to flood, and there are shitty irrigation systems here so the streets flood. That's the one thing that scares me when driving, having to drive through lakes. I get scared that my car is so low that it will get washed away. These are the days when I wish I had a 4x4.

I registered for the San Diego Rock n Roll marathon today with my co-worker Leslie. It will be my fourth marathon. I'm officially ready to get back into running. I'm considering running American River, a 50 mile run that I attempted last year but because of a amateur mistake I had IT bands issues and wasn't able to complete it. So I really want to finish it this year but I'm not sure if I will be ready for one and two if I can really afford it. There will be major thinking going on in the next few weeks as I prepare to get my endurance up to par.

Drivers in Vegas

So I felt that the award blog shouldn't really count for my blog for the day, plus I have other things to say that didn't quite go in there so here's the second blog of the day!

So I was finally able to get my lazy butt out of bed this morning and go to the gym. I went to yoga class and then ran for a little while after. The yoga teacher was one of those stereotypical hippie looking yoga people. She had crazy curly hair, some tight clothes which defined her muscles but also showed her saggy old lady butt. And she kind of didn't smell good. She passed by me and reeked. It was either BO or some stinky perfume. Then again it could have been my shirt cause I smelled it later and it didn't smell that nice. But I really did like her class. I actually felt my muscles working and felt like the class can have some impact on me, as opposed to some of the other yoga classes that I've taken there.

On my way home from the gym it started raining. Its supposed to be rainy all week long. I like the change in weather. Something you may not know about me: I wish I could drag race. I'm a speedster and today it actually might have saved my life, or at least prevented a car accident. When I was getting on the freeway, a van was in the lane beside me. I speed up and took the turn close so I could get in front of the van. I could feel my car swerve a little from the water on the road. When I looked in my rear view mirror I saw the van hydroplaning, it hit the wet spot on the road and its back tires swerved back and forth across the two lanes of the on ramp. Luckily he stayed pretty much in control and it didn't appear that he hit any of the other cars getting on the freeway at the same time. If I hadn't speed off, and I remained the same speed as him, he would have hit me and knocked me off the road.

A few miles down the road, a Fed Ex truck had flipped on its side, most likely he took the curve of the off ramp too fast in the rain and lost control. People in Vegas act like they don't know what rain is and drive insane. A typical day there are so many accidents that happen, it has to at least double or triple during rainy days. I feel bad for the people whose packages were in that truck cause they are probably beaten and broken from the accident.

A Blog Award?!?

So Thanks goes to Katie for awarding me the Haute Mess Award. I didn't know what it was until I googled it =) Yes I had to look it up. I'm still getting to know this blogger thing. So with following the rules of the award here are some random facts about me:

1. I have a small obsession with TEA. Ever since I got sick recently I've become a tea addict. I still love my cup of coffee too though.

<---All the tea currently in the house! My favorite are flavors of white tea.

2. I'm a writer at heart. A doctor in my mind. An athlete in body.

3. I tend to start a lot of things and not finish...

4. I recevied my BS in Biological Sciences from UC Riverside in 2008. And I still have yet to use my degree.

5. No matter how much I love the beach and laying out, I will never tan. I'm a burner.

The Oceanside Harbor. My hometown--->

6. I love clean sheets straight from the dryer. The smell and the warmth make me happy.

7. I have a feeling when I die it will be in a horrible car crash. I have those Final Destination premontions all the time. Or maybe its just cause I'm scared of all the crazy drivers out there.

And now I'm supposed to award blogs that I read and believe deserve the award. But since like I said I'm still new to blogger I don't have 7 so here are four!

1. Random Ramblings Katie's blog!!

2. Sleep Talkin' Man I just discovered and find hilarious.

3. My Favorite Things One of my favorite things to read.

4. Cardigan Empire Classy and fashionable, which is how I would like to describe myself.

Still Waiting

For my Justin Bieber to make me one less lonely girl. Though I would prefer him to be at least 10 years older, I'm not into teenagers and guys younger than me tend to be too immature. Have to admit when I first heard this song and Justin's other songs I thought it was a girl singing. And I didn't really like them, but they are catchy and grow on you after a while.

Yoga

I went to yoga this morning. I finally was able to start my New Year plan. I ran two miles before yoga to warm up and get some cardio in for the day. I like yoga. Probably my favorite part is the relaxation at the end. I have to concentrate on not falling asleep cause that would be embarrassing waking up to find that everyone is leaving cause class is done and i'm the only one remaining in the room.

After the gym I came home, read for a little while before I feel asleep. After napping for an hour, didn't realize how tired I was, I went to Starbucks for some get out of the house time. I wrote a letter to my brother; yes an actual handwritten letter. I haven't wrote a handwritten letter in so many years. Tomorrow i'm continuing on with my New Year anti-lazy plan and starting a workout schedule. I'm planning on going to a variety of classes at the gym so that I'll actually get something out of my $22 a month I spend on that gym membership. I have two gym memberships, which was the dumbest thing in the world to do, but as long as I make the most out of them from now on it won't be a waste of money. I'm hoping to get back into swimming in a week. I used to do it all the time in college at our apartment pool, but haven't swam in a while. I'm not really into the idea of swimming at the gym pool where lots of sweaty people get into after doing other cardio workouts, but I'll be showering with hot hot water afterwards, and in the morning at least the pool water will have had time to clean out during the night a little bit.

Tomorrow morning's plan:

Run to the gym, about 2 miles away

Do weight routine

Run home

I'll let you know how well I stick to my plan.

Figurative Language

January 15th, 2010. Me 0. New Years Resolutions 2. I'm not doing so good with this blogging everyday goal....Still reading A Million Little Pieces by James Frey. I'm attempting to finish it as soon as I can because I purchased my next book: Dear John! This reading thing seems to take me longer now than it used to. One summer I remember reading at least 10 books. That was when I didn't have a job or cable to distract me. Oh well. I'm at page 156 out of 429 so less than half way done. I'm about headed to Starbucks to sip some coffee and get some serious reading done.

I love any type of writing with figurative language and luckily, probably the only reason why this book is keeping me interested, A Million Little Pieces is filled with descriptive parts. This is one of my favorites: "Darkness retreats and the Sun rises. Red, yellow, and orange creep into clear blue, the sweet airborne calls of waking birds echo across the black mirror of the Lake, a crisp draft carries the bitter of cold into the reserve of night. I stand and I walk back to the Unit and the dew on the dead grass soaks through my shoes and I watch my feet break the crystalline perfection of the morning's drops and the drops are just another thing I've destroyed, another thing I can't fix or bring back, another beautiful thing ruined by my carelessness."

Sleepy

Its amazing how tired I am with all the sleep that I get. Two more days of being lazy and then not more. I'm starting a schedule on Sunday and sticking with it. Wish me luck!

PS I love this kitten. Its so adorable. I miss my cat =(

Rain (A work in Progress)

Drop, drop, drop

Tears fall from the clouds

As the wind pushes them around

Covering everything in a translucent substance.

Tickling childrens noses

A drop rolls down their faces

As they jump in the puddles

Where the tears collect.

The sun runs away,

Scared of the clouds sadness.

The lonliness

Makes the clouds howl with emotion.

The light drizzle turns to a furious downpour.

The suns rays peek out

Trying to cheer up the clouds

With a colorful smile.

The tears fall on my window

Putting me to sleep like a lullaby song.

Post Grad

January 12th, 2010. I watched the movie Post Grad today. Got home from work and opened a bottle of $3 Australian Chardonnay from Fresh 'n Easy and sat on the couch and watched the movie. The movie pretty much lived up to my expectations. Made me feel kind of like i'm not alone in the world of unsuccessfully using my $20,000+ degree to get ahead in life and instead working at a crappy retail job. In the end of the movie though she ends up getting her dream job but giving it up for a guy. And though I can see the point that those important in our life should be number one above a job, I don't know if I would give up my dream job for a guy. I think if the guy is worth it, he should adjust his life and allow you to do what you love. I'm not saving he should give up his dreams, but work together to both be able to do what you love and be together.

After Post Grad I watched the new Fame remake and once again wish I had some sort of artistic talent. I wish my parents had been like those show parents or those parents who put their kids in 5 different activites and force them to be the best in all of them, that way I could have maybe had some sort of talent. I think my goal is to excel in either a sport or performaning art. Even though most people who are professionals started when they were kids, I'll work it out and try my hardest to make up for my lack of a childhood. So tomorrow embarks the new chapter in my life, that i've been attepting to start for the past 12 days and will finally put into action tomorrow. Wish me luck in my search to figure out what I want to do for the rest of my life and my soon to be mastered skill.

Things I Don't Understand Entry #2

January 10th and 11th, 2010. So because of a bad internet connection last night I could not blog. Kind of disappointing since I was sticking to my resolution for, well a good week.

The past two days have been no where near exciting, work has taken up most of the daylight hours, watching True Blood on DVD has taken up the rest of the hours until sleep takes over. The show is some what addicting, though at the same time its not very fascinating. I think its just the cliff hangers at the end of the episodes that keep me watching.

Yesterday when going back to my car, after switching out my movies at Blockbuster, the guys who had just parked next to my car were exiting their pickup. They reeked of marijuana. I don't understand how people can just go around, when its so apparent that you stink of the drug, and act normal. Is it some sort of rebellious act like they think its cool that they are doing something so stupid and illegal and they have to show the world what they have been up to by going out in public smelling like rotten trash. I can't even stand cigarette smoke let alone marijuana smoke. I hate going to bars because I know when I go home afterwards I will smell like an ashtray. One characteristic that I avoid in men when looking for a potential date or boyfriend is if he smokes any type of substance. I can't stand smokers. Though there maybe a few smokers out there that are good people, I generally find smokers to be inconsiderate and self-centered. Anyone that thinks its okay to smoke their poison sticks around others who don't, and who don't think about the consequences to theirs that the smoke from their cigarettes causes to the innocent that breathe in their smoke won't get a moment of my time. If you want to slowly kill yourself and ruin your body that's your choice, but don't try to take me down with you.

"If you're lucky enough to be Irish, then you're lucky enough"

Today me and Katie went and watched Leap Year, a cute romantic comedy, my favorite. The movie basically takes place in Ireland. All the scenary of Ireland brought back memories of our family trip back in August to the country. Ireland has been the only International place that I have visited. It meant a significant amount to go there because I'm part Irish; I basically identify with that side of myself too. In the first day of the trip I knew that someday I wanted to go back and visit and maybe even live there. The country is beautiful, the cities are amazing, and the history is everywhere. I loved Dublin; I've always wanted to live in a big city and instantly added Dublin to the list of potential living places for the future. And though I didn't snag the perfect Irish lad while I was there that time, maybe if I'm still single when I go back I'll find my Irishman.

"The Irish-Be they kings, or poets, or farmers, they're a people of great worth, they keep company with the angels, And bring a bit of heaven here to earth."

Someone to Love

January 8th, 2010. So I'm pretty sure that I've probably put 2009 on a few of these blogs cause I'm still stuck in the change of writing a new year phase. It normally takes me a few months to get it down right. And then the New Year comes again and the process repeats itself ever so rapidly.

My friend Teresa and I were born about a week apart in November and almost every time we talk we go through the, "I can't believe how old we are," or "I can't believe how old we are going to be." Today I brought up the point that this year we are turning 25. Now even though I accept that yes we are still young, turning 25 is a pretty major step. Its half way to 30 and that just brings the reality check that we are adults. It seems like in your 20-24 years you are still kind of a teenager. Most people go to college during these years so its not until after these years that the transition into adulthood really takes place. When you are 25 it seems like life should be somewhat planned out, either a career path started or at least planned out. And it all just makes my head spin with how fast my life is passing by, and I feel like I have accomplished so little.

So with the depressing talk done, tomorrow is a new day and hopefully I'll be able to take a few steps in obtaining a potential career position. My plan is to go to the ever so trendy and studious setting of Starbucks to sit on my laptop, and while sitting some coffee edit my resume and submit it to as many jobs as I possibly can. While I am being productive in the perfect career search part of my life, I also plan to take advantage of the potential social encounters and hopefully meet some people or maybe even a date. In the movie 500 Days of Summer, Summer ends up meeting her husband while shes reading Dorian Grey at a Cafe. So I'm being optimistic and thinking the same thing could happen to me. We shall see.

"Dream" Jobs

January 7th, 2010. Growing up it seemed like every year I had a new idea of what I wanted to be when I was older. I remember in Kindergarten we had to illustrate our ideal job. I only remember this because I still have the picture; I wanted to be an animal trainer. Not sure why exactly. I remember for a while though I always wanted to work with animals. Eventually it became a bit more professional, moving from animal trainer to veterinarian. It probably had to do with my love of animals; stuffed animals growing up were my imaginary friends. They were my playmates at home, since my brothers had each other and my mom was very picky about allowing our school friends to come over. Eventually my dream changed to paramedic and then finally to doctor; lawyer, FBI agent, and police officer were thrown in there somewhere, but only for a short amount of time. Its sad to admit but television and movies had a lot of influence on these dreams. Patch Adams showed me what it meant to truly care for the sick; Third watch and ER showed me the excitement of working in a high pressure, busy environment. In college, while I forced myself to stick with my dream of being a doctor and endured all the science courses required, I started thinking that a career that required this much memorization of chemicals and procedures might not be exactly ideal for myself. I started playing around with the idea of entering journalism. I had taken up writing a few times in my childhood, and in one particular English class in college, one assignment make me really consider that I might be in the wrong major. We had to write a poem, and it became my most proud assignment that I've probably ever written. Since then, being a writer as a way to make a living is always in the back of my mind. I feed that hunger with occasionally jotting down the story line to my proposed first novel, or writing a blog with some character, and of course reading example novels and poetry from the masters of the pen.

Currently I am reading James Frey's A Million Little Pieces. The book was a birthday gift from a friend a few years ago and I never touched it until a few weeks ago. Within reading the first page I was hooked. Now there has been controversy with this piece of literature in the validity of the facts of the book, its non-fiction, but either way its a good read. The story itself is a page turned, but the form that Frey uses is what mainly captivates me. I love writing stance that's different from the everyday paragraph and punctuation use. Anyway reading the book got me thinking that a lot of good books come from the authors first person experience in the event that the book was written about. It kind of made me think that the reason why I could not write a good novel is because I have not had that much tragedy in my life.

And then it seemed like that general thinking cause a catastrophe in my life. Its nothing that has personally happened to me, but to my brother but it still affects me in some way. Who knows if it will inspire my first novel, but it does seem to have brought back the dream of studying law. Crazy how things happen.

What Do You Do

When life falls apart?

Things I Don't Understand Entry #1

January 5th, 2009. Today at the store this couple came in and was shopping around. I was talking to my co-workers when I smelt something that I thought was coming from my co-worker Brent and when I smelled his shirt I was sure it was that which smelled like must. But he insisted it wasn't him and when we went into the stock room he explained that it was the customers. After passing the fitting room where the lady had just left, I realized he was right. The couple he explained are probably part of those naturalist types who don't bathe often. Once the couple left, after leaving their stench of body odor throughout the store, we attempted to get rid of it with Lysol, but that just seemed to mix with the BO and make an even worse stink.

I could not image how someone could come to the rational that bathing as little as possible is acceptable. Its not only hygienically displeasing to the senses of others, plus I would think that oneself would be sickened by the stench considering I know for a fact that people know when they smell, I know when I smell, but it also has to be unhealthy with all the germs that your body picks up a day. I know there are days when I don't shower, but that's when I know I'm not going to a public place. If I don't shower in the morning I feel sticky and as though I do smell and people think I stink. Even if I take a shower at night before bed or I feel like I don't really need to take a full shower cause I did nothing, I'll splash myself off in the morning to ensure that I get off all the natural sweat that your body releases all the time (I did that this morning =)). In closing, having a reduced body cleansing schedule is not an acceptable way of life. If you do decide to shower less, stay away from public places or at least spray yourself with a bottle perfume and disinfectant to ensure that others are not punished for your life choices.

Defying Gravity

"Something has changed within me,

Something is not the same,

I'm through with playing by the rules of someone else's game..."

-Wicked and Glee, take your pick =)

January 4th, 2010

I finished watching the first season of Glee today. And it just makes me wish even more that I had some singing talent. I do have my American Idol moments, where I think I could, with the right teaching, have some sort of voice, but I really probably have no potential career as a singer except maybe as a background hum/do-wop fill in. Well no matter if I have no sense of real tone, I'll continue my love of singing at the top of my lungs to a good song in the car or when I'm alone in the house.

Its a New Year

January 1st, 2010. Damn I can't believe its already 2010. New Years Eve marked my one year anniversary of the day that I moved to Vegas. I feel like I've wasted this last year accomplishing nothing meaningful toward my future. I'm still working in a retail job; have yet to start something in a career level position or something that has some significance for what I want to be doing for the rest of my life. And I've yet to make any friends outside of the people that I work with. Though I've definitely come to a plan and realization that 2010 is going to be much different; I'm going to make everyday count and like numerous people are saying 2010 is going to be my year . So following the tradition of the New Year, I've decided to come up with some resolutions/ways to help me keep on track of my plans for this year. Normally I don't succumb to making these types of goals because most people, including myself in the past, fail

to follow through in completing their resolutions. So instead of following suit I usually just say try to do what you can with your life because failing to do what you wanted to just makes it easier to accept the consequences of failure in the future. Its time that I stop allowing myself to be second best and start taking the initiative to be first. My resolutions are attempts to make up for this past year of disappointment and finish the things I've planned to do before.

#1: Publish a blog everyday. I know this was my original reason for starting my blog and I gave up on it after a while. And sometimes I would type a draft or part of one and not finish it/

publish it. But this time...

#2: Obtain a career oriented position. I've planned to go back to school to get my phlebotomy certificate, but in the meantime I'm going to look for jobs at doctor's offices and hospitals to get my foot in the door and get as much experience in the medical field as I can.

#3: Less time on facebook and more time reading books. I've finally gotten over my addiction to facebook games. They had a hold on me for a while and it makes me sad to think

about the hours of my life that I wasted. I've recently finally been able to start reading again; casual reading has never been too big for me, but I do like a captivating book. So the plan will be at least 20 books, hopefully a lot more.

#4: Make an exercise plan and stick with it. I've made many weekly to monthly training calendars this past year either just to attempt to lose some weight or in order to get ready fo

r a race, but I've never fully stuck with it. So I'm planning to make something that I'll be able to work with and will keep me excited to keep going with it. Part of the plan includes running 5 times a week.

#5: Experience life. Making the most out of 2010 is as simple as that. I turned down

invitations to get out in the world and see new places and meet people but this year I will be following the example of "Yes man" (though not to some of the extremes that he did in the movie =)) and accepting those opportunities. I'm also going to get out of the house more often, and not just sit around on my days off and do nothing.

So to catch up with my first resolution for the year...

January 2nd, 2010. For Christmas I bought my brother Jeff tickets for Flogging Molly. It was kind of a selfish present cause I wanted to go and I knew he would probably want to go too. I actually called him to see if he wanted to go as his Christmas present, though I knew his answer; what Irishman wouldn't want to hear an Irish rock band.

So the concert was today at the House of Blues. Two opening bands played, Bible and a Gun, a Johnny Cash cover band which was actually good, and the Arggolites, or something like that, some cholos singing reggae, it was weird. Flogging Molly was amazing. They were entertaining, who wouldn't find a band that drinks Guinness and straight Whiskey on stage

entertaining =), and all the songs they played were awesome. It was probably the first concert that I've been to with a mosh pit, or at least one that was as crazy as the one there.

After the concert we walked down to the newest addition to the strip, City Center to check it out. It is humongous. We got lost a few times. After that we walked back and went home which, as soon as we got into the car, felt awesome to sit down for the seven hours or so on our feet. All in all it was a good way to ring in the New Year.

January 3rd, 2010. Went to work today, the slowest day of work of my life. After work I came home and relaxed with some more Glee and then watched Amelie. So a few months ago when Glee was in season on tv I kept seeing everyone's status' about watching the show and had no idea what it was about. When Katie came back to work she kept telling me that I needed to watch it because I would like it. I thought it was another

reality show from the soundtrack. But then when I was at Blockbuster I found the DVD and saw it was more of a sitcom. So I rented the first disc and in the first five minutes of the first pilot I was hooked. So I've watched the first 8 episodes out of 13 so far, will probably be finished by tomorrow =)

I first watched Amelie in college. Elyse one of my roommates loved the movie and, since they were playing it on campus, insisted that we go watch it. I loved it too. I had looked for it before at Blockbuster but never found it until tonight. Watching it again I definitely could relate to Amelie. I'm a daydreamer just like her. I live in my dreams and always imagine what I wish would happen in my life but never take initiative to make it happen, probably due to years of shyness and anti-social behaviors and friends. But hopefully I'm going to be able to break my barrier and have less daydreams and more actual real life events. The reason for resolution number 5.